Things I Don’t Believe for a Second…

The higher of the two prices on a Winners price tag actually reflects any real market value….there's no way I getting that good a deal.
The three different colors of soap in a car wash contain different ingredients.
The 'wax' spray in that car wash is actually spraying wax on my car.
There is any method to fixing electronics other than unplugging the item, waiting 10 seconds and plugging it in again….I've stopped calling my cable company.
Wii provides any exercise for my kids (my daughter has already figured out she can sit on the couch and snack on dry cereal while wiggling her wrist to whack ninjas).
My body shape changes after exercising and eating right for only 4 days….too bad.
People still don't get the concept of a left lane being for passing (c'mon already!)
Owning a house is more economical than renting one.
Through sheer force of great parenting, I can absolutely control the adults my children will grow to be.
We're alone in the universe.

I have any really original ideas.
Anybody can become an expert at anything after 10,000 hours of working at it.
Everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt.
Buying a car is more economical than leasing one.
My wife's Pad Thai is any healthier than my Big Mac trio.
My kids actually brushed their teeth and washed their hands and face when I'm not looking.
Stories for or against Lance Armstrong.
My kids' personalities aren't fully formed during the second week of pregnancy.